HOLLY NADLER

508-274-2329

(hollynadler@gmail.com)

How ’bout them Celtics? As you’re reading this opening line, you already know the outcome of the crazed Celtics-Lakers, uh, contretemps, shall we call it? However, I’m filing this story on the morning after the sixth game, when it appeared that secret scientists working for the L.A. team had concealed a particle accelerator in the hoop. The purpose of this? To eject balls lofted in that direction by Celtics players. Think about it: even the simplest, can’t-miss layups got regurgitated before they could even hit the rim! This was beyond inept shooting. Only the deployment of clandestine physics could explain it.

Another potential handicapping for the Celtics: those kelly green uniforms. I mean, come on! When was the last time a cute, short Irishman played on the famed basketball team anyway? It’s time to rethink the outfits, the colors, the name itself. No one in the U.S. even pronounces it properly. When did the “S” replace the hard “K” of Celtic?

Maybe you can tell I’m a late-in-life sports fan from the use of words such as “contretemps” and “costumes?” The fact is, I had my St. Paul-at-Damascus moment in sports last week when I sat down next to my new husband, Jack for thirty seconds of quality time as he watched a Red Sox / Phillies game. A certain rookie named Daniel Nava took his first swing in the majors and, you know the rest: home run, three men on base, I think that’s technically known as a grand slam. The whole saga came reeling out, the kid hitting homers in high school, then signing on to — and getting canned from — one crummy indie team after the next. Even the Chico Outlaws told him to hit the bricks! And then, bam! He smacks one over the outfield into the Sox bullpen. Amazing. I was hooked on sports, even going so far as to watch the above-mentioned fifth and sixth Celtics games, biting my fingernails in anticipation of the coming seventh.

I even observed fifteen minutes of the Brazil vs. North Korea soccer game last Tuesday, on an afternoon visit to Jason and Injy Lew. Where will this end? But on the super-plus side, Sophie Lew was home from her first semester at Middlebury College. She showed me a few pics from her work-study program in Nepal last fall. There she was on some Himalayan ridge with a pack of cement on her back, looking ready for a Glamor fashion shoot. This is a young woman who stays poised and pretty no matter what she’s doing. A steady diet of the same rice-and-beans dish for many weeks on end, coupled with the host family’s questionable water supply, landed Soph in the hospital for a few days, but she talks about the incident with her usual bubbly laugh.

Belated happy birthday wishes to — someone!! A couple of weeks ago I received an e-mail from this birthday-person’s friend, Rosemary, who asked me to shout out a happy 70th to a buddy of hers in Oak Bluffs. A couple of things went wrong with this transaction. Rosemary’s e-mail arrived a day after the paper’s deadline. No problem. I replied to Rosemary that I’d extend the greeting to her friend the following week. I have enough brain cells left to remember that a nice woman named Rosemary had requested felicitations for some beloved Oak Bluffster but . . . who was it again? A man with a business in town? . . . hmm. I found an e-mail from Rosemary, but her original message had been deleted; my bad. I’d retained her second e-mail, so I replied again asking for fresh details, but some hole in the broadband system, or solar eruptions, or alien fizzles, kept bouncing Rosemary’s e-mails back to me. Maybe the dog ate them. Then on Tuesday, as I bicycled up that long hill west from the harbor, I passed Town & Country Real Estate and bingo! My amnesia left me like helium from a punctured balloon! Happy Big 7-0, Bob Murphy!

You see? That’s how we professionals (literally) roll. Gee, I hope it was Bob Murphy.

What else? VTA student bus passes are available in the Oak Bluffs school office. The pass is $25 and is valid until 12/31/10. You know what else is cool? If you buy an annual pass for $100, still well-worth the money even halfway into the VTA calendar, the office out near the airport gives you a high-tech flashlight — small case, big light — for those times you ask to be dropped off at the top of a spooky dark road.

Congratulations to all 170 members of the class of 2010 at the Martha’s Vineyard Regional High School. If any one of you ever finds yourself at the top of a spooky dark road, just remember there’s always a light somewhere nearby, especially if you purchased a bus pass!