Each winter I try to cross a couple of items off my to-do list, while I have a bit more free time. This winter I put a sump pump in the basement and had a son.

There have been occasions this winter when I, too, have thought that I could see Russia from my perch on the bluff. Such is our Alaskan landscape. With the outer harbor frozen over as far as my eye has muscle, it appears that the ice is endless. Sometimes only the twinkling lights of Edgartown remind me at night that I am connected at all to a populous.

I have considered slathering Baby E in whale blubber in an effort to insure his warmth, or in fact just placing him directly into the belly of a whale, but decided instead to get him some snugly stuff from the Prime Outlets. And besides, the weather seems to be encouraging a rise in the mercury — I think the Junebugs are already getting the sticky stuff on their feet prepared for summer screen visits.

There are winter days here on Chappy when the snow freezes to my Kia (despite its undercoat of salt) and my stretch of North Neck becomes all but impassable that I question my choice of residence. But then I think of Peter Wells, and remembering that his snow shovel consists of an excavator atop a ferry, I don’t feel so overtaxed. The Chappy ferry Facebook page, as well as the Gazette article by Tom Dunlop, do a far better job of documenting this task of ice breaking, so I would direct you there for a description of Peter’s efforts to clear a path across the harbor for safe travel. But, I can tell you this: looking at the pictures of the effort, I feel that I better have something really, really important to do on the other side or I don’t think I could face the ferry captains. Alphonso needing a third and fourth choice of Fancy Feast flavors just doesn’t make muster.

Our newborn Etienne will be signing copies of his new book, I Scream and Poop, Therefore I Am, at the CCC all this week. Please stop by and pick up a copy, and the baby while you’re at it. I kid — he’s delightful . . . just hasn’t quite learned proper etiquette for night time voice volume. He is a wonder, and Arlene did a lovely job of growing the little guy for all those months. And I did a lovely job of watching her do a lovely job. Fortunately, I did spend my part of the nine months productively growing my belly large enough to provide an ample shelf for Etienne’s nap times on my chest.

Finally, I’ll be taking bids from local contractors for my new project. I plan to spray plaster on the giant snow piles in our town parking lots, and then hollow out small hovels that I can rent out as air-conditioned apartments for the summer help.

Enjoy the snow. It won’t be long before you can no more coat your darker clothing with a delicious patina of salt and sand just by lightly brushing up against the side of your car.

Send your Chappy news to ibwsgolf@aol.com.