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Carol Potter Whitmarsh

Carol Potter Whitmarsh died on August 8. She was 76.

Carol was born on January 21, 1950 in New York City, and lived most of her life dedicated to raising her family on Martha’s Vineyard.

She was surrounded by and cared for by her family throughout her last days. She was very alert and aware of those around her until the very end. The gift she gave her loved ones was the opportunity to tell her how much they loved her and to thank her for all she had done for each of them.

She was the matriarch of her family: her husband, her sons, a niece more like a daughter to her, her granddaughters, and her daughters-in-laws; she loved them all unconditionally.

During her final days, those close to her came to an understanding best described by Viktor Frankl: “Love goes very far beyond the physical person of the beloved. It finds its deepest meaning in its spiritual being, one’s inner self. Whether or not one is actually present, whether or not one is still alive at all, ceases somehow to be of importance.”

Carol’s life was full of extraordinary accomplishments as a wife, a mother, a grandmother, a friend and a community activist. Most would agree she was a keen observer of human nature. She was a great judge of character, and if she were fond of you and respected you, she would give endlessly of herself to you.

She served her community for many years. She loved her work with teenagers at Martha’s Vineyard Regional High School, who would go out of their way to greet her with broad smiles and affection whenever they saw her in the community. Her colleagues often sought out advice and counsel from her. She served on the Edgartown personnel board for several years and on committees in Edgartown, Martha’s Vineyard Regional High School and the all-Island school committee for nine years.

She was an avid bridge player and is loved and dearly missed by the bridge community on the Island. She had many years of camaraderie and enjoyment with her many bridge friends. She liked to use her highly intelligent mind to compete at bridge, and she also loved to watch Jeopardy with her husband, often dazzling him with her extensive knowledge about so many things.

Most importantly, she will always be remembered for the depth of her character, her infectious laugh and the love of her family, friends and our community. Her spirit will carry on in the heart of the love of her life, her husband, and within her children, grandchildren, the rest of her extended family, and many friends.

She leaves behind her husband, Tom Bennett; her sons, Kane, Jason and Theodore; her niece-daughter, Jade and her family; her granddaughters, Dalila, Lily, Ayla and Alyssa; her daughters-in-law and past and present partners, Jennifer, Pam and Kissyla; her sisters, Linda and Dorothy and their husbands Howard and Bill; her nieces, Katherine and Dorothy and Dorothy’s family; her dear and cherished cousins and many friends.

The family wants to thank Martha’s Vineyard Hospital, Brigham and Women’s Hospital and Hospice of Martha’s Vineyard for their very caring, professional and comforting services throughout her illness. In lieu of flowers, gifts can be made to Hospice of Martha’s Vineyard.

There will be a graveside memorial service at the New West Side Cemetery in Edgartown on Nov. 7 at 11 a.m.

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