Shirley McCarthy Faces Fight for Special Family

By MANDY LOCKE

At 30 Lagoon avenue, strollers and tiny tot trucks have reserved
parking at the foot of the front steps. Two signs - "Welcome
to the Funny Farm" and "Be nice to your children because
they will pick your nursing home" - hang from the front
door, preparing newcomers for and reminding regulars of the unusual life
led by the woman on the other side of the door.

Just inside, 70-year-old Shirley McCarthy's welcome is cut
short by the need to correct two-year-old Phillip O'Neill, who
reaches for his seven-month-old sister Kellie Ann. And with that,
Shirley offers a smile as she slides down the couch and pats the cushion
beside her.

This is Shirley McCarthy's life - comfortable chaos. The
kind of commotion that only a house filled with 13 children, from
toddlers to teens, can create, the kind of disarray that partially
packed cardboard boxes exaggerate.

These days, Shirley's otherwise manageable chaos spirals out
of control in the wake of news that her landlord is selling her home of
31 years.

"I've never lived like this before," Shirley says,
looking around.

Within the walls of this modest ranch-style home, nearly 300
children learned to crawl, walk, talk, laugh and love. Shirley welcomed
each one into her home for day or foster care, or adoption. Last year,
the state Department of Social Services recognized Shirley's work
here by naming her foster mother of the year.

Both 18-year-old Charley McCarthy - Shirley's shy and
withdrawn daughter, adopted after suffering malnutrition and abuse at
age four - and Jessica O'Neill - who, as a pregnant
teenager, needed a home not just for herself but the two babies she
would bear - found places within Shirley's patchwork family.
And Shirley kept her door open to her biological daughter Tonia, who
currently is battling lupus, and three grandchildren.

"She is the epitome of what we always say we want to be. She
takes the broken children," says Myra Jones Romain, a friend and
attorney who is helping Shirley sift through her mounting financial
problems.

But it is Shirley who could use a little mending right now. A
naturally petite woman, worry claimed too many pounds this last month,
leaving her cheeks hollow and her pants baggy. Tears are never far from
the surface, though she does her best to hide them from her children.

"Moving out of this house . . . I feel like my whole life is
going," Shirley says.

With bills piling up and mouths to feed, news of the sale of the
house is even harder to handle. Two operations in the last two years,
along with an ongoing fight with diabetes, forced Shirley to all but
cease her day-care service. Now she feeds 15, pays exorbitant utility
bills and monthly rent of $1,000 with only her social security and the
social service stipends she receives for some of the foster children.

Shirley manages only small payments toward the $2,400 balance on her
electric bill, and only Kellie Ann's age prevents the electric
company from pulling the plug on their service. Some of the teenagers
pitch in to the family budget with money from their after-school jobs,
but a weekly grocery bill of $300 absorbs their contributions.

Shirley has fought her fair share of battles in 70 years. Without
finishing high school, she became a military wife, traveling the world
with a husband who later became abusive. Their marriage faded after
moving to the Vineyard, but despite not having his income, she took in
and adopted more foster children.

But Shirley is not quite sure she can muster enough strength for the
newest battle.

"I'm not a fighter. Why can't people just love one
another?" she asks. "It's an awful feeling to not have
anywhere to go - no family off-Island."

The Island community is not prepared to let Shirley leave them.
Concerned friends set up a family home fund for Shirley at
Martha's Vineyard Cooperative Bank. Shirley's church family
at St. Augustine's vows to help in any way they can. And a
nameless young woman appeared at her doorstep just before Christmas with
a gift of $200.

Neil Estrella, of Edgartown, gave Shirley a Christmas card filled
with the promise to pour her a house foundation if she secures a spot of
land.

"She's done so much for me and so many other people,
I'm glad to help her out," Mr. Estrella says.

Marc O'Donnell and Barry Stone of MV Electricians are finding
tradesmen to donate their time to build Shirley and her family a home.

"If we step up to the plate, maybe a plumber, an insulator and
a painter will as well," Mr. O'Donnell says. Mr.
O'Donnell hopes suppliers will donate equipment or sell at cost.

"It's not just about Shirley - it's about
the whole idea of what Shirley is," he adds.

While he feels certain tradesmen will stand behind Shirley, it will
take more than bricks and mortar to relocate her family. On an Island
where land prices climb well into the six figures, the project depends
on someone donating a parcel of land.

"There is a way. There's never a shortage of people
wanting to help," Mr. O'Donnell says.

While friends and strangers scramble to find a home for Shirley and
her children, Shirley waits. Friends and family encourage her to get a
nice one-bedroom apartment and scatter the children in various homes,
but she refuses.

"I'm not going anywhere without my kids. I won't
give up on them," she declares.

And it's Shirley's commitment to them that allowed
Jessica to get her general educational diploma, enabled Charley to
secure a loan for a used car and taught Kellie Ann how to clap.

"We always talk about how children are our future. Then, one
comes along who isn't exactly what we'd hoped, and we push
them aside," Ms. Romain says. "What makes Shirley different
is that she really takes to heart that children are our future.

"Once she gets one through, she adopts another."