Mickey Barnes, of Harwichport, formerly of Falmouth, and Martha’s Vineyard, died at the Cape Cod Hospital on Saturday, Dec. 9 after a short stay.
She had also lived in Westfield, N.J., Lakewood, Ohio, Monessen, Pa., North Hills and Ben Avon in Pittsburgh, Pa. (where she was raised), and seasonally in Sarasota and Bradenton, Fla. and Ashtabula, Ohio.
She had celebrated her 93rd birthday on Dec. 4 with her daughters and grandchildren at a lunch, on Face Time and phone, with cards and flowers. An early adopter who used technology in her overlapping careers of mom, homemaker and reference librarian, Mickey asked for and had just received her first smartphone as a birthday gift.
She was widely and fondly regarded for her kindness and lively interests: people, friends, ideas, conversation, bridge, piano playing, singing, hospitality and volunteering to help others. She was warmly devoted to her beloved husband, Gaylord Beckley (Hap) Barnes (1921-2002), whom she met on a blind date just after World War II as a recent graduate of Chatham University (then Pennsylvania College for Women), and their four daughters — Rebecca Gay Barnes of Seattle, Wash., Nancy McKee Barnes of Haverhill, Judith Caroline Barnes Gabriel of Grover Beach, Ca., and Katharine Elizabeth Barnes Finn of Sudbury.
Her love for her family happily embraced her seven grandchildren: Kristen Smith of Salem, Derek Smith and his son Jeremy and wife Chelsea Brown Smith of Amherst, Maxwell Finn of Somerville, Benjamin Gabriel of San Francisco, Ca., Samuel Finn of Sudbury, Margot Smith of Danvers, and Alex Gabriel of Sacramento, Ca.
She also loved her church, most recently the Unitarian Universalist Church of Chatham, where she sang with gusto in the choir for many years. Patrons of libraries in Westfield, N.J., Martha’s Vineyard (longest and last at West Tisbury) remember Mickey as a friend, whose ready laughter and efforts to help them find just the right book selection or the resource they needed for their own projects. After retiring, she helped develop Books on Wheels for the Harwich Library, bringing enjoyment and meaning to people unable to get to the library themselves.
Christmas was a special time always for Mickey, a time for catching up with friends through her annual holiday letter, for celebrating often, and enjoying family visits. Family car rides to see Christmas lights and sing carols remain a strong and lovely memory for her daughters, and an amusing tale for her grandchildren. Already this year, carols had found their way into her daily piano playing.
The Melrose, a Harwichport condominium retirement community, had been her home since 2001. Many wonderful friendships were made there, where Mickey founded and produced The Melrose Musings to introduce new residents and share community news. She was a stalwart and avid player at weekly bridge games. The Melrose’s own library was originally organized and maintained by Mickey, and many social events (parties for every occasion) were inspired and shaped by her sense of community and fun. Friends and neighbors came to know her also for her loyalty, sense of justice and caring for people less fortunate, interest in our political leaders as role models, her strong independent spirit, and her lively mind and infectious enjoyment of music and good humor.
A memorial service, organized by her daughters, will be planned at the Melrose in Harwichport after the holidays. For information, please contact Becky Barnes at brgrgb@gmail.com.
Donations in her memory can be made to the Unitarian Universalist Association of Boston at 24 Farnsworth Street, Boston, MA 02210, the Books on Wheels program at Harwich Brooks Free Library at 739 Main St., Harwich, MA 02645, or the West Tisbury Library at 1042 State Rd., West Tisbury, MA 02575.
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