Joan Wefald Norton died peacefully at the Martha’s Vineyard Hospital on Feb. 10 at the age of 93 years, 9 months and 12 days. Her life was marked by selflessness and grace.
Born Morna Joan Wefald on April 29, 1930, in Winona, Minn., she was the eldest child of Egil and Morna Wefald. Her family moved around the state with father Egil, a renowned civil engineer instrumental in building Minnesota’s highway system. The family settled in Fergus Falls where Joan graduated from high school.
She attended St. Olaf College for two years before returning home to Richfield, Minn. She attended the University of Minnesota while caring for her two sisters and ailing mother who died at age 49 because of complications from multiple sclerosis and diabetes, which — as Joan said in her later years — she kindly did not give to her.
After her mother’s death, Joan’s father encouraged her to head out on an adventure of her own. In 1954 she headed west and settled in San Francisco. She embraced her new life, working at McGraw Hill and becoming an active member of the Spinsters Society, a prominent social and philanthropic organization.
She met Jack Wilson in the vibrant Bay Area social scene and they married in 1959. Their honeymoon was brief as Jack was asked by his father to take over the family insurance business. In 1960 they traded San Francisco for the Big Apple.
The couple settled in to a new life on the Upper East Side, which included the births of their daughters, Anne and Heather. Nine months after Heather’s birth, they headed to Bronxville, N.Y. Sons Brad and John were born after the move and Joan lovingly raised her four children and served as an active member of the community.
In addition to shepherding a steady stream of sports, plays and play dates, she was an active member of the Junior League and the Dutch Reformed Church and gained renown for her meatloaf and miniature English muffins, a Christmas treat anticipated around the village.
Every year, the day after school let out, she packed all four kids in the Impala wagon and headed to the family’s summer home at 5 Wilbur Lane in Edgartown. Joan threw herself in to Edgartown life. No one missed a swimming, sailing or tennis lesson or a trip to the beach. At the Edgartown Yacht Club, she was regular on the ladies’ doubles circuit and took up racing on Rhodes 19s and Shields.
She also opened her house to the people who encouraged her kids. There was rarely a day without a gaggle of lifeguards, tennis and sailing instructors who stopped by to do laundry, grab a snack, or just hang out.
She, along with Susie Whittemore, became one of the first women to serve on the yacht club race committee. She served two terms as a yacht club trustee and the number of committees she served on or chaired at both the yacht club and Chappaquiddick Beach Club is lengthy.
Divorced in 1990, she moved permanently to Edgartown and embraced her new life. Joan, Linda Warriner, Nancy Vietor, Nancy Haskell and a few other women started their own soup kitchen, badgering stores and restaurants for their leftovers and delivering homemade soup to the food pantry.
Joan found S. Bailey Norton, the love of her life. They married and spent 17 years together. Family, community and their Fortier 30 Gem became their lodestars. Family and friends were always welcome at 90 North Water street, except when Nana and Bailey were on a cruise with the yacht club or on their annual trips to Maine. One of her greatest achievements was earning Bailey’s trust and becoming an exceptional mate.
Life slowed down in her later years as dementia took hold. She was lovingly cared for by her daughter Heather, ably assisted by bestie Donna Montesion and kept in shape by Griffin Hughes Douglas.
Joan is survived by all four of her children and her grandchildren, Alice Lewis, Cooper Wilson, Dorothy Navarro, Anna Wilson, Beatrice Badway and Jack Wilson.
She was predeceased by her parents, sisters Connie Lundeen and Sara Jane Wefald Howard-Riddle, and her second husband, S. Bailey Norton.
In lieu of flowers the family request that you put a smile on someone’s face. Nana would like that.
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