Michael W. Herlihy died at his home in Falmouth on May 9. He was 80.
Arlington. Oak Bluffs. Falmouth. Aguadilla. Dublin. New Bedford. Prince Edward’s Island. London. Thailand and Vietnam. These were places he knew and where he spent time with the people he loved.
Michael was born in Boston on April 18, 1944. He and his siblings Edward (Judy) and Patricia (James) were raised by loving parents Bill and Hope (Sullivan) Herlihy on Barlett avenue in Arlington, at Rock avenue in the Camp Ground, at 10 Kennebec street, and later on Carole avenue in Oak Bluffs.
While serving in the Air Force, Michael married Donna Tolsma, the love of his life. They began a lifelong passion for parenthood with the arrival of Jen (Edward), Amy (William) and Jeff (Joanna), and grandparenthood, with Grace, Faith, Jay, Rose, Santiago and Alejandro.
Michael and Donna moved to Cape Cod in 1970. He worked as social worker in New Bedford and then with the Department of Mental Health in Edgartown and Pocasset.
In retirement, he continued serving others as a part of his Catholic calling. His many years volunteering for the Falmouth Road Race, Fairwinds and the Falmouth Service Center gave him pride in the happiness of others. He enjoyed weekly mass at St. Patrick’s, St. Joseph’s and St. Thomas in Falmouth, and at Nuestra Señora de la Candelaria in Mayagüez.
To questions like would you like to go to the beach today? The Vineyard? The Florida Keys this winter? Puerto Rico next week? A drive on Fay Road? Krispy Kreme in Mayagüez? Ireland for New Year’s? Crashboat this afternoon? Menemsha at sunset? Surf Drive for a swim? Michael’s answer was yes. Always yes.
He enjoyed champagne on the Islander’s last run from Vineyard Haven to Woods Hole in 2007, and he skippered several boats over the years, including the Red Arrow (Oak Bluffs), This is It (Jenkin’s Pond), Hopeful (Lagoon), The Conflict (Falmouth Harbor), and the JAN JAM DJ (Lagoon).
He wrote about his boyhood: “I spent every summer from 1950 on the Island. It was a whole different world from Arlington. I remember working in the post office giving mail to our first Black senator and going to deliver telegrams to Bill Russell from the Celtic’s. I picked up balls in a bowling alley, pumped gas and delivered milk.”
His last time on the Flying Horses, he got the brass ring and gave the free ride to his grandsons.
In the grips of the illness that took his life, his love for family endured. He taught everyone to love the ocean and the Vineyard, but also each other.
If the saddest part of life is when a person who gave you memories becomes a memory, hard things are also beautiful. We still get to be his children, call him Dad, and know that his memory restores and gives reorientation.
Michael, Mike, grandpa, abuelito, dad — having a father like you makes a lot possible. As you would often say, “Every day is important.” This is especially true this day.
Visiting hours will be held at Chapman Funerals and Cremations, 475 Main Street Falmouth on Monday, May 20 from 4 to 7 p.m.
A funeral mass will be held on Tuesday, May 21 at 11 a.m. at St. Patrick’s Roman Catholic Church, 511 Main Street, Falmouth. Interment will follow at the Massachusetts National Cemetery in Bourne at 1:15 p.m.
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